BOOM
by Knight-whosays-ni
Summary: Boom! Dean and Ron get into an argument. Boom! Ginny buys a bathing suit. BOOM! Ron meets a barbecue.The whole school of Hogwarts goies BOOM when a picnic is planned
1. Chapter 1

AN -- I saw the challenge, and --what can I say?-- I was intrigued. It's a bit different from my normal style, but it's a fun little thing. I hope.

- - - - - -

"Did you hear?"

"The 'Plan'?"

"Yeah! I heard about that! I wonder what it is!"

All around Hogwarts little cliques were gathering in hallways, whispering in clandestine meetings. Word spread quickly, even when the professors were firmly against discussion of 'The Plan' in any way, shape, or form.

It all started two weeks ago, when a discussion between Dean Thomas and Ron Weasley was overheard by Dumbledore.

"What do you mean 'You didn't know what Quidditch was before you came here? What did you do?"

"All sorts of stuff! Football, Rugby, that American thing that they call football."

"What in blazes are you going on about?"

" Oh! Barbecues! You'd love Barbecues, Ron! They're all about eating!"

"You didn't even play QUADPOT?" At this, Dean let out a frustrated cry.

"I bet that if we'd have some sort of Muggle event at this school, you'd have some clue what I was talking about! As it is-"

"An EXCELLENT idea, Mr. Thomas!" Dumbledore cried from right behind him, making Dean look like he'd stepped on a baby blast ended skrewt and was looking the mother in the eye. "Mr. Thomas, I charge you with finding a crew of oh, five or six people with muggle raising, and come to me with an event you'd like to have, say... oh, in a month? Very good, Mr. Thomas." And he left without another word. Ginny, taking a look at the shocked expression still mingled with the pained expression from before, dissolved into giggles.

"Oh... Well, Hermion-"

"Let's leave the Head Girl out of this, shall we? She's got a busy schedule as it is." Dumbledore called over his shoulder. "Oh, Harry too." Dean groaned and Ron smirked. Seeing the look on her boyfriend's face, Hermione elbowed Ron shaprly.

"Ron! You should take more of an interest in Muggle things! Especially with the line of work your father is in!"

"Oh for the love of Merlin!"

"I think it's a great idea." Harry said. Everyone looked at him, startled at the first words he'd said since he sat down. "Think about how pissed Malfoy'll be." After another moment, there was a round of cheering and laughing.

And that brings us to the present.

Dean had assembled a troupe of muggle-borns and half bloods, consisting of Seamus Finnigan, Justin Finch-Fletchly, Colin and Dennis Creevey, and himself. They concocted a plan. That is all that is known... at present.

- - - - - -

"Ginny!" Colin rushed into the Common Room. Lucky for him, said red-head was reading a book curled up on the couch.

"Hmm?" She replied.

"Get your purse now! We have to get down to Hogsmede!"

"Oh, I dunno, I was thinking of skipping it today. I'm feeling a bit tired."

"NO! You are going to Hogsmede NOW!" Ginny was surprised at the urgency in his voice.

"What? Why? Oh, 'The Plan'?"

"Yes! There's to be... well, I'll tell you once we're out of here!" Ginny shrugged and went upstairs to grab her purse and change her robe.

After handing the form to Filch for his unscrupulous scanning, the two sixth years were on their way to the old wizarding village.

"So, what's this about Colin? What's 'The Plan?'" He shook his head.

"I can't tell you the whole 'Plan', but..."

"Then why the hell did you drag me out of my peaceful, not to mention comfortable, couch?"

"Hush! As I was saying, I can't tell you the whole plan, but I can tell you that there's going to be a certain competition. And this way, we can get a head on the rush."

"Oh, do tell!"

"Bathing suits."

"Oh crap."

"What? What's wrong with that?" Colin asked, genuinely curious.

"I can't stand bathing suits. I can't stand anything revealing. You know that." Colin swore and looked away sheepishly. "Colin..." Ginny moaned in that tone that let him know that she knew that he suggested the idea.

"It's too late now! It's mandatory for fourth years and above!" Ginny growled and followed her overly-enthused friend through the wrought iron gates on the outskirts of the school grounds.

"Damn my being a sixth year."

"THERE you are!" Dean ran into the Three Broomsticks breathless and sweaty. Hermione wrinkled her nose in distaste and motioned for him to take a seat... as far away from her as possible.

"Whadya need?" Ron asked, Harry nodding in agreement.

"There's going to be..." He panted. "A ..." Just then Ginny sprinted over to Hermione and grabbed her upper arm.

"Time to GO Hermione! Colin is impossible to shop for bathing suits with! He keeps talking about these 'sack races' and how he'd 'like to get in the sack with her'. Whoever the hell 'her' is."

Everyone at the table look at Ginny as if lobsters were crawling out of her ears as she led Hermione out of the pub. Ron's ears went a vivid shade of red.

"Well." Ron stated in a voice slightly higher than his normal tenor. Dean started to laugh. Hysterically. "Well." Ron repeated, voice somewhat normal. "Want to explain what THAT was all about?" But Dean couldn't. He was still laughing. Harry had to bite his lip for a few moments before explaining the concept of a sack race.

"Oh! So that's what Ginny meant by 'getting in the sack'?" Harry and Dean nodded, still hard pressed to keep from laughing.

"Yes Ron. Now, I do believe that it is time we leave. Perhaps to get our own bathing suits?" Dean nodded and hurriedly ushered the other two males out the door.

"The clothing store is featuring some bathing suits for the occasion. We'd best get going. Can't get caught in the rush!"

"Yes mother."

"Shut up you hag."

"Yes mum."

"Ugh!"

"Ginny! Come on! Those last eight bathing suits you tried on were splendid!" Hermione yawned. Ginny sighed. She just couldn't help it. Really, she would be appearing in front of Harry in this suit. She better as hell make it worth every knut. And Hermione had such an easy time finding her bathing suits. Bikini tops were made for C cups and one-pieces were made for B or D cups. cups. Hermione was a solid C. Ginny was more of a... C+. Hence the incredible problem finding the right suit. As Ginny walked out in a dark green one piece (B), she cried out in frustration once reaching the three-way mirror.

"I look like a top heavy asparagus!" At this Hermione started laughing.

"Hey, you were the one who loved that from 'the moment you set your eyes on it'!" Ginny groaned.

"I know! I know! Oh jeez! You look great in your suit! You'd prolly have better luck finding me one!" Ginny slammed the fitting room door shut, throwing the bathing suit on top of the hook.

"Fine." Hermione said.

"What?" Ginny stuck her head through the gap above the door.

"I'l go pick out a bathing suit for you." Ginny shrugged.

"Go ahead. I'm out of stuff to try on."

"I still think that once that thing gets wet..." Hermione let out an exasperated noise and placed a hand over Ginny's mouth.

"Shut up, will you? You've already paid, and the suit is non refundable. I think... oh... you know what I think?" Ginny looked around to see what caused the sudden change of her friend's tone.

"Too much?" She replied cautiously.

"I think that, even though he's a greasy git, Malfoy would look good in that suit!" Hermione pointed to a lime green speedo. It was Ginny's turn to start lauging.

"I know I'd sure like to see Malfoy in that! It's rumored he's got quite the package. Then again, the goon's as poofy as one of those cheezy poofs you're always on about."

"Well hello there, Weasley. Didn't know you thought so highly of me." Ginny turned around and looked Malfoy in the eye.

"Like I said, just rumors. Spread by Parkinson. Prolly talking about herself. C'mon Mione."

And just like that, BOOM! Draco Malfoy came to a dramatic conclusion.

Weasley was right.

Parkinson WAS packing!

- - - - - - -

Disclaimer: all the characters, places, and stuff you know and love all belong to the wonderful JK Rowling. Meaning not me.


	2. Chapter 2

"That was..." Hermione began

"Brilliant? Superb? Bloody excellent?" Ginny supplied.

"Disturbing." Ginny nodded.

"I'd have to agree. But you've gotta admit, having Malfoy just walk up to you, thank you for no apparent reason, and promise he'll never torture you again is a good thing."

"But he's MALFOY! He might not even keep his promise." Ginny shrugged and sipped on her lemonade, obviously thinking.

"One could only hope." She finally replied, leaving Hermione openmouthed and ready to take a bite of her sandwich.

"What?" She cried, dropping said sandwich on her platter with a splat. "That was great! Malfoy just told us both that he wouldn't mess with us anymore! This is absolutely brilliant!"

"You're contradicting yourself, Mione." Ginny frowned. "But really. For six, or in your case, seven straight years, Malfoy's been reliable. Not in a good way, he just has been. He's been a mean, nasty, stuck up prick ever since we met him. We could always count on him to do the wrong thing. Now that he might be nice... who knows what he could be hiding? At least when he's a git, we know the world's not upside down." Hermione nodded after a moment of consideration. Or maybe it was the rather large toucan that landed on her shoulder and tarted screeching obcenities in many languages.

"Fine, fine. Can I finish my sandwich now?" Ginny smirked as she nodded. The bird huffed and puffed and then blew itself up into multi-colored confetti.

"You know, Mione, you're becoming more and more like my brother every day." Ginny observed with a smile as she dusted the confetti off her shoulders. Hermione gave Ginny a long look from her current, about-to-bite-the-sandwich position.

"I'm not sure if that's an insult or a compliment."

"Oi! What was that about! Malfoy just HUGGED my sister!" Ron was furious, nose pressed to the glass window of The Three Broomsticks.

"I'm sure it was nothing." Harry said, even though the odd feeling in his gut made Harry want to run behind the nearest bush and empty his stomach.  
The exploding bird did nothing to improve his queasy state.

After a moment of silence in respect for the bird (well, either that or the three were sufficiantly wierded out or, in Harry's case, to queasy to talk), Ron spoke up.

"Well, one thing's for sure!" Ron cried. Dean looked over at him. Harry swallowed uncomfortably.

"What's that?"

"Malfoy's about to be nothing!"

"Ron. Ron! RON!" Harry and Dean both had to restrain Ron from taking off after Malfoy. "Let's just go ask Ginny, ok?" Ron seemed to consider this for a moment, then nodded his (obviously reluctant) consent. Wrenching his arms from the hold the other two seventh year males had on them, Ron stalked up to hysterically laughing sister and Hermione.

"Well?" He cried, throwing his arms up in the air. "What was that about?" Both girls looked at Ron for a full thirty seconds before starting to laugh again, Hermione included. "WELL?"

"Well what?" Ginny giggled.

"Well what the bloody hell was Malfoy doing hugging you?"

"Thanking me."

"You helped a Malfoy out? Where has your pride gone!"

"I guess I must have placed it out to dry with my knickers!" Ginny and Hermione got up and left the pub, money on the table. Still laughing.

"Girls are nuts." Dean whispered to Harry.

"Don't have to tell me twice." Harry responded, though his mind was currently affixed upon the quandary that was Ginny. And her knickers. More so her knickers than Ginny. Sort of.

Dumbledore had made the announcement.

The shopping trips had been made.

The last minute preperations had been completed.

The Picnic had yet to be held.

"IT'S THE DAY OF THE PICNIC!" Ginny awoke with a scream when one of her roommates  
– Amiee – jumped on her bed, chanting.

"Merlin, Amiee! Don't DO that!" Ginny grumbled. "What time is it?"

"Twenty minutes till set up!" Amiee cried. "So get UP, sleepy head! Otherwise we'll miss the cheese futon!" Ginny blinked, letting the information register in her mind. Then she looked at Amiee as if she were mad.

"Um... don't you mean fondue?" Amiee made a sound that seemed remarkably like 'pish.'

"Futon, fondue, what's the difference?" She said, flippantly waving her hand. Ginny shook her head and made her way blearily into the shower.

Twenty minutes later, Ginny exited the bathroom in a frenzy.

"AH! I've got to get dressed! Shirt, gotta find a... a... wait, bathing suit! That's it! Bathing suit!"Ginny rummaged through her trunk and pulled out the number. Shuddering slightly, she went back into the bathroom and changed. On her way out, she grabbed a shirt, shorts, and her sarong, just in case.

"Oi! HARRY! Ten minutes until we have to be down there!" Ron screamed into Harry's ear, causing the latter to twitch violently and fall off of his bed.

"RON!" Harry shouted after a glance at the clock informed him that he had more than thirty minutes until he was needed. Ron looked at Harry somewhat meekly.

"Sorry, mate. But I tried getting you up several times, once, you nearly hexed me!" Harry glared at Ron in response and lurched into the bathroom to shower and see if he could do something about his hair.

Twenty minutes later, Harry could be found lounging around in the common room, as it is a well known fact that boys do not take nearly as long in the shower as girls do. In fact, there is significant evidence to support the fact that the male species do not so much 'bathe' as 'dance around in the water for five minutes'. (Also , if the author wasn't smacking herself for procrastinating and leaving this story to the last minute, she too would be part of the study... though, the observer, not the observed.) But Harry was still clean. And as he took the opportunity to relax in the common room, he was tripped upon by none other than Ginevra Weasley, trying in vain to hop around on one foot while trying to pull a pair of shorts over the other.

With a veritable screech, Ginny went down in what could only be described as a 'flaming pile of limbs', tripping over Harry's extended leg.

"WHY YOU BLOODY WANKER! I'LL GUT YOU AND HANG YOU BY YOUR... oh, hello Harry!" Distracted by her sudden change of subject and Ginny's choice of words, Harry was a moment slow in reacting.

"Oh! Erm, Hullo Gin..." He took one glance at her skimpy purple tank top over what was obviously a bathing suit, her tiny white shorts and the barely-there sarong wound around her (in his mind 'luscious') hips, and had a second spaz attack.

"AND NOW FOR THE BATHING SUIT CONTESTS!" Dumbledore called in his macigally amplified voice. "MALES FIRST! Representing Hufflepuff, Sixth year, DAVID HASSLEHOF!" Hermione also had her second spaz attack of the day (as seeing Ron toting the barbecue had given her the first), and saw that most of the other muggle borns and half bloods did the same. Sporting electric blue swim trunks with no design, he was 'voted off'. As was the fifth year from Slytherin (Porter Cole) and Gryffindor ( Tommy Gnat), leaving the winner to be ...

"KEVIN MEYERS! RAVENCLAW, by vote of your peers, you ARE our winner!" The fifth year accepted his medal, awarded to him by Professor Dumbledore.

For the sixth years, there wasn't anything exciting. Well, Ginny's ex was laughed off the podium.  
Hufflepuff won.

Then, for the seventh years...

"Hufflepuff! ERNIE MACMILLIAN!" Interesting, but, no.

"Ravenclaw! TERRY BOOT!" Getting warmer...

"Gryffindor! DEAN THOMAS!" Close, but, hot pink REALLY isn't his color.

"Slytherin! DRACO MALFOY!" Half the female (and a fair bit of the male) population swooned when Draco took the stage. Ginny and Hermione, however...

"Oh... my GAWD!" Ginny screeched. "He PICKED the SUIT!" On that warm and sunny April afternoon, Draco was wearing a lime green speedo. The same speedo that Hermione and Ginny had been laughing at a week ago.

The vote was unanimous.

Draco won.

And then, BOOM!

Ron lit the grill.

And put new meaning to the phrase 'Flaming Red Head.'

AN: Standard Disclaimers apply.


	3. Chapter 3

AN- Roses are red, violets are blue, me no own, you no sue!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

"Well, after THAT little... interruption, I do believe it's time to move on to the Girls' Contest!" A large cheer from the boys' (the ones not affected by Draco's display) side of the stands supported this statement. Ginny fiddled with her tee shirt before Professor McGonagall came by, demanding that every spare piece of clothing be deposited in the receptacle behind the curtain. Ginny reluctantly took her shirt, sarong, and shorts and threw them into the bin.

"Fifth year! Hufflepuff! Olivia Stenton!" Cheers. "Ravenclaw, Joni Northrop!" More cheers. "Gryffindor, Helga Goreski!" Cheering continues. "Slytherin, Ali Martinson!" Cheering again.

"By vote of your peers, Olivia you ARE our winner!" Oh god, Sixth year up next! Ginny adjusted the metal ring holding her top together. She sighed and looked back down at her suit.  
A beige color, there was a gold ring connecting the two pieces of fabric between her breasts. Two smaller rings were at her hips, holding the bottom together as well. Fairly simple, but Ginny was sure that as soon as it got wet, it would become completely see through.

"Sixth year! Hufflepuff! Amanda Johanson." Dumbledore Paused. "Ravenclaw, Joanna Tyler!" Another pause for more cheering. "Slytherin! Jamie Goddette. Cheering... again. "Gryffindor! Ginny Weasley!" Ginny felt her stomach do a little flip before entering from behind the curtains. Complete and utter silence greeted her. Ginny clenched her fists and closed her eyes, knowing that she must be furiously red by now. What a contrast!

'My GOD!' Harry thought in wonder. 'So THAT'S what those school robes have been hiding! She's drop dead GORGEOUS!' Many of the other males were thinking along a similar vein.

Just then, Hermione started applauding, quickly followed by Ron and Harry, Malfoy, and soon the entire male population of Hogwarts were cheering wildly(– well, not Ron, he was rather scandalized she would wear something so revealing– )including Harry. ESPECIALLY Harry.

"Ginny Weasley, by almost unanimous vote of your peers, you ARE our winner!" Ginny (still blushing) accepted her medal and withdrew with the crowd to the grill, which Hermione had helped Ron with. Thankfully. Otherwise the author wouldn't be sure if Hogwarts even existed anymore.

- - - - -

After waiting in the long queue, hotdog in hand, Ginny grabbed her sarong and walked out past the young groups setting up areas to eat, or playing games. Ginny nearly lost her hotdog when avoiding the frisbee that Jamie Goddette 'accidentally' threw her way. Rolling her eyes, Ginny continued on to a flat topped rock by the lake where she sat down and brought her knees to her chest, munching happily on her meal. She laughed heartily when Colin won first place at the sack races, then promptly crashed right into the girl he had been raving about at the clothing store. There was Ron, killing everyone at the pie eating contests. And... bloody hell, is that HERMIONE? God lord, it is!

Standing at the tip of one of the Squid's upraised tentacles, at least four meters up, was Hermione, poised in her purple suit. Then... voila! She jumped, and in a graceful ark, she landed in the water with almost no splash. A toucan that looked remarkably like the one that had dusted half the Three Broomsticks in confetti landed on the rock beside Ginny, this time muttering like a mother. Also, this time, it didn't explode. It folded itself until it was tiny, and then imploded. Which is not the same as exploding, I hope you all know.

- - - - - - -  
A puff of purple smoke was all it took to send Harry over the edge. Well, that, and the fact that the bloody bird (that he SWORE he saw explode in the pub a week ago) wouldn't stop mumbling things in his ear. Because, when the bird exploded – which is not the same as imploding– in the purple smoke, he caught sight of Ginny sitting on the stone, laughing her arse off. Setting his jaw, he strode off to her rock. To do what, he wasn't sure. But off he was. When he reached her, she glanced over at him and smiled.

"Harry! Perfect! Come on!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the water.

"Wait, Ginny, what?" Ginny stopped dragging him and looked at Harry, then herself, and smacked her forehead.

"Gha, how stupid of me!" Her other hand let go of Harry's, and went to the knot of her sarong, undoing it with deft fingers. She then folded it neatly and placed it onto her rock. When she looked back at Harry, she tapped her foot. "Well then, off with the shirt. And the glasses!" Harry twitched for the THIRD time today. Eh?

"Eh?" He voiced shakily. She sighed and took his glasses, placed them on her folded sarong and went back to Harry, taking the hem of his shirt in her hands and pulling it up over his head, even though he was a great deal taller than she. Folding it as neatly as she had her sarong, she set it down.

"Now, that wasn't so hard was it?" she asked, and, not waiting for a reply, "Time for a swim!"

"S-swimming?" He stammered as she grabbed his upper arm and tugged him into the water.

"Yes, swimming! That's what one normally does in a swimsuit. What was your naughty mind thinking?"

"NOTHING!" He replied, a bit to quickly for his own comfort.

He had no idea how uncomfortable he was about to be.

- - - - - - - - - -

"We're going to dive off the SQUID!" Harry cried when they got onto aforementioned animal's tentacle.

"Yes, we are Harry. Now hold on tight." Harry did as he was told, not wanting to fall of the tentacle that was lifting them. Standing on the very edge, and very nervous, Harry grabbed Ginny's hand. Ginny didn't seem to notice, so was she wrapped up in the wind that was blowing about. Harry gulped as he looked down at least 9 meters. Yarg.

"Ginny are you sure you want to do this?" She laughed as the breeze whipped tendrils of hair around her face.

"What, is the great Harry Potter, Boy-who-lived, seeker and quidditch captain AFRAID of a little jump?"

"I wouldn't call that little!" He countered

"Come on, you fly higher than this every day in quidditch!"

"I'm not about to dive off my broom!"

"We jump on three! One..."

"Ginny..."

"Two..."

"Ginny, wait!"

"Three!" and she jumped.

"GINNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE..." and Harry jumped with her.

Harry looked over at Ginny as they fell, hair streaming out behind her, a huge smile on her face as she screamed with joy, and (from what he could see without his glasses) a smudge of freckles over her nose and high cheekbones, sticking out against her alabaster skin, glowing with excitement. It was then that Harry realized that he was very attracted to her.

SPLASH!

As Harry plunged deep into the quasi-warm waters of the lake, he remembered how she was so nice to him, how her smile lit up a room, and how she joked with him about things no one else dared talk about. So many memories in such a short period of time. It was then Harry realized he was very, very in love with her.

So, when he surfaced, just moments before she did, he had figured out what he was going to do. He was, as soon as she surfaced (and took a breath, he didn't want her turning blue) he would kiss her in the most amazing way he could.

It was perfect! Romantic, sweet, and suave. Er, well, it would have been, if ... if he... hadn't ... missed.

Hey! It happens when you're as blind as a bat without glasses.

You see (as he very well couldn't), he spotted two Ginny's... well, Ginny-like blurs. So he picked one at random. Unfortunately for both parties, he picked the wrong one, nearly snogging the squid's tentacle.

"Um, Harry?" she asked, holding back a laugh. "What are you–!" She was cut off by him finally picking the right blur.

And all was good.

Well, all was good until some poor bloke jumped, apparently not seeing them. I mean, come on, how can you not see red on blue/black.

And then, after a good laugh and several pieces of various pies, all was good again.

For a while.

and Boom, it was Happily ever after!

- - - - -

PHEW! It's DONE!SOOOOOO sorry it's so short! Luv ya! Don't hurt me!


End file.
